i want two things in life...emily to stop talking and a block of cheese.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
i just threw up ON my final. epic way to end the semester.
id like to know how you successfully locked me in your backseat last night
Lost another pound. Switching from beer to hard liquor did this body good.
I blew him while watching the aristocats. There were singing cats in the background. I think he he hummed along at one point.
Tabs I had open this morning: "15 hedgehogs with things that look like hedgehogs" and an unexplored google search for "how do I express my love of tacos"
Date idea: we should go to the store and buy all the different kinds of Lay's and eat them all
Well according to all the calls, texts, and Facebook messages, I threw up on you guys last night.
I had a flashback of using my sock as a napkin after we got taco bell
Last night at the bar you we're seriously going up to people and pushing through them like they were bowling pins and you were a bowling ball
I puked in the back of my mom's new car because I had too much to drink at Chilis. I think I just hit rock bottom.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
I just don't know how to say "I want to have sex you with before you graduate" in a classy way
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