i told my doctor i had 3 partners and one unprotected.. shes a cute little indian lady i couldnt break her heart
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
The seats are awesome but you see two of each player.
I'm going to start telling people I'm a sophomore so they stop asking me about college and what I want to do with my life
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
We made a bong out of a plastic football. I can honestly say we make a good team.
I thought your voice was coming from the walls. I've never been so relieved to find you naked in a closet
They conduct scientific research memoirs about what sort of shit happened last night after I ate those cookies.
Hey, please tell me that you and dad are having actual steaks tonight and I did not just get sexted by my dad
Next time, please cut me off before I'm at the point of pooping in the bathtub again
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
I swear to God if you fuck my cousin I will fuck your dad.
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
God gave you your own nipples for a reason.
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