Some guy with no shirt on and his pants undone informed us he was kicked out of the cab
I asked him why, and he had absolutely no idea.
Dude, TWO hot chicks on jeopardy tonight. gonna be a good one
Dude, I am so turned on right now. Hot chick with glasses from brooklyn is absolutely crushing right now, taking whole categories. might beat off to jeapordy...
do another line during during the commercial and make the magic happen during double jeopardy.
I'm playing a drinking game with nyc prep. This will not end well for meeee
Everytime the gay dude pretends he's not gay, drink a cosmo. Everytime the crosseyed girl is crosseyed, kill her
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
Yelling drunk tank or bust at a cop, not a good idea
I feel like I'm taking part in a surprise porno. At least my hair looked good.
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
So far, my day has been sparkling with the tears of a thousand rainbow unicorns. I'd say this is quality shit you've grown.
It's like the sisterhood of the traveling vaginas over here
So he just rolled you off his dick and fell on the floor?
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
You've been dating this guy for a month now and as your best friend I have to complain that I still don't how big his dick is.
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
Randomize
