as i creep her facebook pics from back in the day till now, i noticed that her lazy eye has gotten better
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Dont even bother asking why she was dancing with him on top of a door, let alone how the door ended up being used as a table.
Why did 20 jello shots in a row sound like a good idea last night?
Left my card at the bar and had a drunk girl climb on the hood of my running car to scream at me.
I really wish I had added "blowjob on a slide at a playground" to my bucket list before last night.
by "whatever happens, happens" i meant "we are totally hooking up again on tuesday." i thought that was obvious.
On the oral sex Super Bowl board I drew 7 and 1. If I get lucky, someone will be swallowing during Madonna's half time. I'm sure she'd approve.
I don't remember but we shouldn't have a problem. Unless drunk you encouraged drunk me not to wear a condom.
I think we have a problem.
Honestly you'd think more guys would be happy to date a cute female dealer, but apparently something about safety or whatever
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
I dont know who to turn my two weeks notice into so I'm just going to get hammered at work and see who fires me.
Randomize
