Her cum face looks like the large marge scene in pee-wees big adventure
I least I know I can't get pregnant because it's on my hair
we got a new version of the plan b at the pharmacy now. its called next choice. you would think they would come up with better names for these things.
it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
maybe next time you shouldn't be drinking alone watching intervention at 3 am and no one would think you needed an intervention.
He has a tattoo of a carebear. This is not happening.
thank you for reminding me that I stumbled into a public place drunk at 9am wearing a chicks pants.
I'd love to sympathize with you but I'm drunk in a mansion
well, the two that sent pics I've already been with, so at least its not just BAM HERE'S MY PENIS IN YOUR INBOX ENJOY THOSE MEGAPIXELS
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
I'm making poor life decisions again. Tune in tomorrow to see how much I hate life.
ORGASMS AND PIZZA
PIZZA AND ORGASMS
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
Do you think this 2 hour Amazon delivery thing works on vibrators? Cause that would be clutch
I'm about to take plan-b with a glass of wine and ramen noodles. I cannot decide who will hurt more...my vagina, my kidneys or my pride.
Randomize
