hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
ok plan lets look hot and dance like whores.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
insurance, jail, and birth control were made for people like us.
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
The kid I'm babysitting just asked if I had a boyfriend. WHY IS A FOUR YEAR OLD MAKING ME FEEL BAD ABOUT MY LIFE
No, I googled it. Apparently, male thongs are the next snuggy and a lot of guys love wearing them for the support.
How was the party? Lets put it this way: "He wants her dick" was a factual sentence stated last night.
I felt that there wouldn't be enough planB and forgiveness to go around
I'm sitting on the floor singing Bruno mars while they cook and occasionally pet me
I just googled: how soon can I pee on a stick. What is my life coming to.
Molly was fun. I was in a captain planet onesie in Wal-Mart talking to everyone haha
I'm definitely not mad. My best friend is dating my drug dealer, it's impossible to be mad.
please come back. it's turned into strip rock paper scissors
Randomize
