How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
I'm at a crab and wine festival with my dad. He just introduced me as his girlfriend to all of his co-workers. I am so drunk I thought he was serious.
can i drink enough to forget this semester even happened?
friends with benefits? more like friends with awkward sexual tension
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
could you clean the juice and feathers off my bed I'm just not up for hangover cleaning.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Like he and the nurses kept being so persistent with it and I just wanted to run out of there in my backless gown and yell FUCK OFF BITCHES IM OUT
I just want to emotionally destroy him but also find out how big his dick is so this is perfect
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Thanks for reminding me of all the hookups my brain has been trying to suppress...
That's what friends are foooooooor!
Jesus fuck that was emotional whiplash
I don't know what to say to you.
I don't know what I said to you. Start with that.
Randomize