a very overweight girl in the ER just said she trippped over the invisible wii jump rope and fell
dude I just sharted for the first time ever, kind of gross
well what did you think, shitting your pants would be fun
when i spit it made a heart shape. i think it's a sign
i'm sorry for cheering you on when you were making out with him. i was just celebrating the fact he was decent looking for once
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
I remember nothing of last night, but I did manage to figure out which frats I went to by the trails of straw across campus.
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
I didn't even realize I grinded on a security guard last night. Shit. Did he at least like it?
I assume some self respect is too lofty of a gift idea
I think my favorite day of the week is the day we get to fuck
I think someone cast a spell on the lazy stoner rich boy stereotype and it came to life and called me.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
