I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
I just remember standing in the shower with you eating chips.
he opened the microwave and beer cans poured out
If Amber from Teen Mom can get a new boyfriend, so can I.
So i do have strep. My apologies to the british guy from this weekend. You now have one more reason to hate america
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
Tomorrow night wont work for me. I'm talking with Bryan about marriage and I dont want to have a shroom hangover.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
Went as "Party on, Wayne." And left as, "Partied out Wayne in a foot boot with new medical bills." Fuck Halloween...and vodka.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
