let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
she really just asked how mermaids reproduce.
He looked down at his phone and screamed "I'M NOT A DAD!" and then bought the entire bar a round
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
I'm glad I booty called you last night. It was nice to see you and talk, in between all the sex...
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
Is it acceptable to have my intern get me pedialite and plan b?
It's a learning experience. She can add to her resume that she cured her bosses hangover and poor decisions
Let's just say we ended up at Denny's with a strippers shoe that we had to discreetly leave at the door to the strip club this morning
He just showed up. He's like 5'8 and brought a beer pong table that has " I love gay boys" on it. How could this go wrong
So just what does one wear when attending a sex toy party with ones mother-in-law?
Jeans and a nice top.
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I gave three different guys a boner at the same time last night, and none of them are in the same city as I am. That's achievement.
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
Randomize
