just got a rotting pancake and bacon in the mail from your address....
no more everclear, i just stood next to the toilet and peed my pants. then went back to the party soaking wet.
He kissed my cheek and I could smell it the whole way home like shit
i just hugged the lady at the liquor store goodbye for the summer...
what has two thumbs and is going to bang you boss on monday?
I ended up with a gash in my head from drunken dancing last night. I love life.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
If this party got busted it would be an improvement
I wasn't trying to be rude when I hurriedly walked past you, but I can not put in to words exactly how bad I had to shit.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
Bacon and your penis are involved. Of course I'm going over.
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
