Cops are here now. U need to come back. Ur not under arrest. But u need to apologize to the woman for what you did to her cat.
How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
I need like a "Cookong High for Idiots" book. Or a car.
I'm sorry i'm just too high to handle anything besides pirates of the caribbean right now.
2 showers later and I'm still finding cum on random body parts of mine
I still think it's messed up that you're naming your kids after all the guys you slept with in college
I vagually remember taking your birthcontrol and washing it down with ash water
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
She asked for her virginity back. I don't know what to say
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
this night may include but is not limited to : police encounters, wild animals, stomach pumping, and waking up in a field
OMG LOOK AT THAT PIECE OF MAN
I haven’t trained for this.
Randomize
