Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(214): View more from Texas

I just watched a guy get turned down by a prostitute

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(614): View more from Ohio

so are u like ashamed lol?

(513): View more from Ohio

not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip

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(618): View more from Illinois

so i'm just gonna leave my credit card in your mailbox so you can bail me outta jail.. deal?

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(647): View more from Ontario

on my arm i have a score card from when we apparently had a competition to see who could harden his nipples fastest..

(1-647): View more from Ontario

who won?

(647): View more from Ontario

THAT is your concern right now?

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Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Read it at the TFLN blog
(805): View more from California

a commercial for my antidepressant came on and they said you shouldn't take if if you drink right as i took a shot

(818): View more from California

god is laughing at you again

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(780): View more from Alberta, CA

My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.

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(605): View more from South Dakota

We have been pregaming the shutdown of the government since Tuesday. Send help, and some more liquor.

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(774): View more from Massachusetts

It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour

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(512): View more from Texas

Here's a tip: do NOT chant "MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS. MATTHEWS." during sex because the Packers won against the Giants.

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