is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
I don't know what I could have possibly done in a past life to deserve watching my boyfriend projectile vomit margaritas and probs blood while completely naked.
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
At one point last night while tipping the bartender you looked at him and said "If I need money later, I'm taking this back"
i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
I made two strippers play rock paper scissors to see who would give me a lap dance last night
Came to from my blackout with native american warrior facepaint on I'm too old for this shit
The facepaint not the blacking out
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
I apparantly wanted to name her baby garbage
I appreciate alcohol much more now that I have to be sober sometimes
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
hey if my parents say thanks for the meatballs just go with it ill explain later
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