so he must've not known that your lastname is Came because everytime someone would say your name he would scream "NO SHE DIDNT" to the whole party. He must've not been too good then either.
i dont know what to do
with your life?
no, with my silly bandz, im already wearing 3
I remember sitting there at the toilet, bleeding everywhere and thinking, "I walked from my bedroom to here. What happened?"
No no I got the black eyes when I tried to do a flip off the second deck of a pontoon boat. Actually when I did a flip, it was a success.
Dude I live in a fucking closet and still get laid every weekend. Figure it out.
hey give me heads up if you're feeling vulnerable tomorrow night
You kno how some people just need a "everything will be alright" pat on the back? I need an "everything will be alright" blowjob right now. Come over
Did we smoke in a portapotty last night? And if so, do you think the brown stuff covering my body is actually dirt?
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
So, left this guys house wearing a #1 Grandpa shirt and I think this is the best sex score I've ever had.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Fuck baseball, getting drunk and playing with kittens is the REAL national pasttime
Also mom is not happy about me telling her how much i want the women sprinters on the Olympics to beat me up
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
Randomize
