I read the police report. You asked the cop if you could use his in-car computer to update your facebook. No way you get out of a DUI.
once the tequila comes in everyone elses feelings go out the window.
Gentleman, we have a new medal category - number of women per day in apartment WITHOUT FURNITURE
Well look at it this way, if he should happen to get into a terrible accident within the next 2 days, its okay.. i have his dental records on my ass cheek.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why do I have flashes of a dark shed in my memory?
Because we had sex in one.
I have now slept with people from more countries than Ive actually visited. Can we make this a game somehow? Like foreign fuck buddy bingo?
She looked at my cock with a kind of resigned disappointment.
shes wearing an ankle tracker so she should be easy to find
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i wore a power symbol belly button ring just so i can drunkenly tell him that he turns me on. i dont care if it works i think its classy
I'd say "I think I gave my TA chlamydia" is an accurate way to sum up my life.
Who knew that showing someone your boobs would make them stop crying.
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
Well waking up naked, covered in Chex mix is not how I planned to start my Wednesday if that's what you're getting at.
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Randomize