Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
i just won a 100 dollar gift card to walmart in a karaoke contest...i love kentucky
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Every time a song comes on I get sad if glee has not a cover of it
I awoke in a cab to find myself on a ride to niagara falls. Apparently I paid the cab driver half up front.
I wish you would stop telling everyone that your cock turned me into a Bears fan.
I find it worrying that she bit me in bed. Then proceeded to write her name in bite marks. All without ever losing the rhythm of our fucking.
When did our fuck buddy relationship, turn into me babysitting his dog?
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
we're at the bar celebrating my ex bootycall getting his new gf pregnant... and me narrowly escaping a future as kitty foreman
He makes bad life choices and drives a wagon, how is that not my type?
Randomize