JOSHUA! WE ARE SO BREAKING UP!
what?
YOU'RE DRUNK AGAIN, ARENT YOU?!
can't decide if i want to get drunk or coked for this harry potter thing.. it is kind of long
aren't you going with children?
she was sure she was an eel. She spent 40 minutes sliterhing on the floor to get to her room
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Some girl at my gym just tried to casually drop the fact she can kegel 3 lbs...
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
I was originally going to go as fembot from Austin Powers
I wanted to have tiny guns for tits
I woke up sick this morning, maybe sucking a random dudes finger at a bar last night wasn't that clean of an idea.....
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
You are an awesome peach made of glitter.
I'm torn between wanting to wear lipstick and wanting to make out with strangers.
Last nights hook up turn into a star wars history lesson.. He's luck y he's pretty..
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
Randomize
