Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
Dude, you posted a cap of a porn to survey if it looked like me. That's pretty certifiably creepy.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
as it turns out, there is no "i was in the pool" excuse for adderall-induced shrinkage.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
yeah except there is a correlation between drinking moonshine and going blind, which kind of concerns me
Were playing beruit winners pelt losers with eggs
Look at you go. You're like the Slutty Librarian that Could. They should write children's books about you. Children's books for adults.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Teaching my class, used paper clips to fix my hair. Too hungover to be a kindergarten teacher.
Can't tell if its the LSD or if that demon man just stared at my penis. Cleveland is a weird place. All true stories.
I slept with the Australian in the bathroom of a gay bar. What has my life become.
She said I'm going to get you stoned and have you fuck me on the couch.
Our relationship revolved around Taylor Swift albums. It's no wonder it ended so fast
i just woke up from a 4 hour nap, still drunk, to make mac n cheese.
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