Guess who has two thumbs, loves booze, and just dug half a handle of rumb out of a trash can in a freshmen dorm? This classy gentleman. Good day to you sir!
its a nice change of pace not blacking out and actually remembering getting laid
I just saw her shopping list. The only things on it are blackberries, hot fudge and condoms. I almost don't wanna know. Almost.
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
It's one of those things you just need to see in person at least once in your life. Like Niagara falls or some shit. His ass is the Niagara falls of asses
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
Is it just me or does the sex still keep getting better? I wasn't crying, my eyes just watered from how hard I was cumming.
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I need a priest, doctor, and therapist after this weekend.
You came walking in the backyard at 10am, in cowboy boots, a new shirt, and had no money,....we lost you for 15 hours....i think you just need a camera crew, or an assistant. IMPRESSED!
You continued to run around saying "free the nipple" while "taste testing" every liquor on the premises.
He handed me a beer to drink as he went down on me. I want to keep him
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
I think I just saw my socks in the parking lot.. gonna keep walking
I cannot, in good conscience, let you talk to a guy who wears Chaps and a knit beanie
I apparently ooze single. The second I left his house after break up sex five of my old booty calls text me
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