Let me rephrase. Would it display my intentions too much if i walked all the way across my office and into the bathroom carrying my book
nutella sex= disaster
I'm starting to have hip problems from having my legs spread too often.
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
it's official, after last weekend my girl number is higher than my guy number. fix this.
He has horses apparently. I wonder if we could fuck while riding a horse or if that's too dangerous.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
Last night I dreamt that I sold my car and used the money to have wheels surgically implanted in my feet and legs so I became a human heely and I just rolled everywhere
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
I just traded a couple nudes for pizza delivery. Call me lazy, easy, or an entrepreneur, but either way I'll have dominoes in 15 minutes.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
So, I just ordered a breathalyzer for this weekend. I figured if I'm getting shitfaced, I should at least be scientific about it.
Sorry I drunk. I wouldn’t eat those pancakes. I think I put glitter in them.
Randomize
