Just did shrooms. Don't feel shit! Wsasted 40 bucks on this! Nothing's happenig except for this little gnome on my shoulder and the couch is melting. Fuckin waste of money.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
anyone who says 'i love you' and then followed by 'im going to call the cops if you touch me' doesnt really mean the first part fyi
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
are you just going to ignore any texts involving my penis from now on? because thats going to shut down a pretty sizeable portion of our conversations.
Her face was so far in my boobs, I didn't think she'd make it out. She took it like a man. She's a real trooper.
Just checked an empty cooler on the flight to Notre Dame. You don't have to tell me you're jealous, I already know.
Went to get my tattoo today. Found out the piercing girl is bi. I may just get my nipples done to get hit on tomorrow. Confidence is low these days.
Definitely sounds like it's time for some eggs with a side of strap on
It's like all my brain cells are screaming at me.
I'm dying.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Haha its fine we ask know it. He's still cool thought
Focus on the keyboard man. Focusssss
Your choices in alcohol this weekend are thoroughly disappointing
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
I'm still trying to figure out who shit on the coffee table. I have confirmed beyond a reasonable doubt that it wasn't me.
Randomize
