there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
Is my tampon string too long for this dress?
Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
i always forget that thursday isnt the weekend in the real world
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Last night after we fucked, I washed my vag in vodka so I wouldn't get an STD
Or, you could have used a condom
I have got to stop assigning last names to girls I get numbers from based on what I think will remind me of them... Sarah Petrydish is not an acceptable memory trigger
oh dont worry, my liver will give out way before i get skin cancer
She made me take my shoes off outside her room but she didn't make me wear a condom. I am confused.
I spent the whole weekend building houses out of popsicle sticks for my bowls. How was your weekend?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need to ask my mom where the drain cleaner is, but I'm afraid she'll ask why and the answer to that will just be "cum."
Did you seduce any young men into coming home to your love nest of poutine and jäger bombs?
So apparently I initiate sex in my sleep
Oh god theyre drunkenly throwing knifes now, definitely the best movie I've worked on
Went to a club yesterday was dirty dancing with this guy, reached back to move my hair and punched him in the face.
ANTI-GAME
I am so proud to call you my friend
Tinder has really served to stimulate the number of sex related demons summonings.
Randomize