I want the hot one, scratch that. anyone.
I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
he got instantly turned off in the middle of a blowjob when he heard the news "twilight beat the blockbuster record of batman"
Dude I was fucking my girl on the couch and her dog came up and licked my balls. Does that mean we just had a threesome?
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
After he came he asked what I was doing for thanksgiving.
I now own a bag of cigarettes and have no purse, awesome
I would recommend NOT getting ass enhancement shots.
I told her my cab was outside the club and that I had to go, but I think we both knew this wasn't going anywhere past the sloppy bathroom handjob.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
I'm gonna take a crap in the portashitter like a civilized human being.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
Dad is wasting no time getting back out there. Just walked in on him and a Twin Peaks waitress in the hot tub
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