Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
The cops found weed in michael jacksons house today...it makes up for the child molesting, I like him more now.
I am pretty sure I told him the clouds were earth's purest filtration system and that snow was the rarest and most delicious water in the world. My lips are burning because we ate so much.
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
No dude trust me, just go a strip club at their busiest hours and pick the ugliest chick. Guaranteed she blows you for under 20$, the record stands at $7.67 and a pen from Bank of America,
I think I'm in love. He's everything I ever wanted for myself, just with a lot more drugs.
shes taking the breakup well, i walked in on her naked passed out wearing a turban with a bag of peanut butter choc chips in hand at 5 in the afternoon.
I woke up on karas dogs bed. Lets evaluate our lives.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
he had a Pillsbury dough boy tattoo to remind him of his drug dealing days
my whole checking account just had a funeral down bourban street, paid for that, and then bought everyone 5 shots of fireball...
Got a snapchat from Megan last night showing you sobbing about a burrito on the floor with Dan in the background trying not to laugh his ass off
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
Pregaming at Jodi's. Ten minutes
Thought it was at Brad's?
Pregaming the pregame. Need alcohol before I can see that dick.
Randomize
