): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
New drinking game watching teenage mutant ninja turtles movie and drinking every time raphael says damn, someone says april or ms oneil, and shredder appears And every time we see a mustache
you freaked out because you thought your face lotion was cum in a bottle
And your hair- I'd make sure to pee on it first.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
How are you feeling?
Hungover as shit. Someone just knocked on my window to make sure I was alive. I have been sleeping in the drivers seat for an hour parked outside my store. That is how okay I am.
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
let me just inform you that suppository-ing xanax is glorious
I'm trying to get WebMD to diagnose me with a hangover
My roommates said duck dynasty was stupid ... toto i don't believe we're in kansas anymore.
Sometimes I look at her and just start choking. She is that much of an evil entity.
I checked her ID this morning. Lets just say...she's older than my mom
Finding my pants in the morning should not make me this proud
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