You're the unicorn of the gay community. Unbelievable and unattainable.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
so after he got his stomach pumped, he asked for a smoking room.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
Is King's over? Or do I still have to say 'On Matt's cock' at the end of every sentence on matt's cock?
The only downside so far to having a guy roommate is that when he's doing a walmart run, I just can't bring myself to ask him to pick up a pregnancy test for me. I feel like that's just too much too soon.
Upperdeckered the toilet. Took sombrero off, drawing too much heat. Witnessed glassing. In bush, come findme.
Weekend has begun hello red wine at 10am on a Wednesday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So it's always a good weekend when you don't get any sleep, try opening a bottle of wine on rocks, and end up needing a tetanus booster for our stupidity... Same thing next weekend?
She has "Massive Shits" listed as a turn off. That's very specific and there's a story behind it I bet.
Sweet, got a date tomorrow night
I've never seen an uncircumcised penis. I mean in person. I've clearly seen an uncircumcised penis. I have the google.
You are under a naked attack watch for the whole weekend. Shelter in place.
I'm all set for mothers day, I let her beat me in beer pong.
Seriously, he's as bad as Joffrey. I hope this ends like Game Of Thrones did.
Randomize