smell like capt'n and strawberry champagne
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Like many of my risky ideas this has "burned genitals" written all over it
I would just watch. I wouldn't even have a boner cuz I would do so much coke. It would just be funny.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
You just want to fuck a girl in a dinosaur costume, don't you?
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
I made him an O's fan. One pic of my tits coming out of a Baltimore shirt and it was done.
We may have picked the wrong resort. Brenna and I have already been propositioned for swinging twice and we've only been here 3 hours
He said he cried as he watched porn yesterday; I'd say he's taking the break-up pretty bad....
The last two times I had sex with him I forgot who it was half way through
Idk if I deserve a medal or a one way ticket to hell
Sorry for face licking, I probably won't do it again.
Also, I love cats. I sat on the floor and they sat with me.
outside on the street drinkin, walked into a random house and asked to pee, some kid hands me a beer and says i have to chug it first
Once you start using "cuddles" as a code word for sex you'll never get real cuddles again
Randomize
