Does leaving at 3 give Sara enough time to take the bus or are you picking her up?
I cant tell if your joking or not, but I'm picking her up
Do you need some kind of permission slip from her parents or can anyone just go and grab a high schooler these days?
It was the single greastest thing to happen to my dick ever
they hired a photographer to take a family portrait for grandmas bday gift. we just hired a male stripper. we are def the better grandkids.
She forgot my birthday again. How do you forget something that came out of your vagina???
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
it was all good until he screamed "for fraaannnceee" on his last thrust
The security guard popped his head over the mens room door and goes "nice tits- now get out." Deer in headlights moment right there.
I woke him up with a blow job and he started sing "oh the USAAAA. IT'S GOING TO BE S BEAUTIFUL DAYYYYY"
We'll find out our level of friendship after tonight. You'll be helping me move a body. My body.
Oh shit. My drunken car sex is on Google Earth.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
I spent the last 6 months operating under the assumption that I HADNT fucked a paramedic. I was wrong.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
Randomize
