We were gonna play Truth or Dare but like 10 minutes in we decided to get naked and play Dare or Get the fuck out.
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
Do you think they make a "sorry in my drunken debauchery I dropped a pumpkin off the balcony and you happened to be standing right there/get well soon" card?
is it weird that I didn't think he was hot last night when I was making out with him but right now I'm Facebook stalking him and think he's really attractive??
your beer goggles are on backwards.
Thoughts of banging the girl who just opened my beer with her teeth?
Guess who just sucked off 1/5 of one direction?
True love: he brought me a margarita while I was n the shower. He's a keeper.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
It's a good thing you're straight. You'd make a horrible lesbian.
Is kiddo a correct name to call someone who you stuck your dick in?
He grabbed my tits and sang "you are so beautiful" to them before faceplanting into my chest
Are you aware that you called your mom to say hi before you dragged the random guy into bed last night?
There is a huge naked guy in the kitchen with the boner of a lifetime and what I believe is an assault rifle casually resting on his shoulder.
Randomize
