I didn't mind getting the stomach flu from him. we had great sex AND I'm seven pounds lighter
Guess whose mug shot is NOT on the Internet anymore?!?!
...im seriously confused as to why this doesn't make sense to you. Girl hostage, rob casino. Makes perfect sense.
Idk man, she was drunker than me and i was sitting there talking to a raccoon about it's broken leg.
is there any kind of "im boning my neighbor and he happens to be a manager at walmart" discount that our new relationship entitles me to??
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
That guy was drunk and couldn't get it up so he just tried to scissor me.
Pro tip: if you can avoid puking on your carpet, do so. Cleaning it up is absolutely no fun at all.
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
he called me 'mate' and i had to remind him that you dont call people mate who continously make your dick hard
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
listen i get youre a daddy dom but that doesnt give you a pass to make dad jokes
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
Did you make it home alright?
No I'm sitting under a tree by a cricket. He's alone crying out for someone to Fuck him. This guy gets me.
Y'all let us switch shirts in the middle of 200 people....why did you let me get this drunk by noon?
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