a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
THEY SHOULD WARN YOU WHEN THEY MAKE JELLO SHOTS WITH JACK DANIELS!!! THEY SHOULD WARN YOU!!!!!!!
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
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I'm pretty sure getting a blow job behind a bar in Rome while her little sister is throwing up in a dumpster not 5 feet away, gives entirely new meaning to the phrase "When in Rome"
Running across campus through Hurricane Sandy while hammered and in a slutty cowgirl costume obviously should be top priority tonight
Beat the bartender in a shot challenge for a free tab. I won that, and him. I never get tired of the "this is my first time with a guy.." bullshit.
How do you even...
The magic of Christmas. And whiskey, of course.
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
He told me I was "too flexible." Excuse me?
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He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I think you're literally the first guy to ever pick up a chick from pinterest.
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
SHE POOPED THE CONDOM WHOLE
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
The ass gains better be worth it
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