It's fine actually... I'm pretty sure he had the crookedest weiner in the world anyway.
Like he had it hanging in the wind and you just decided, "nope, I don't think that one's for me." ????
God no! I could just feel it. His clock said it was 8:00 when, clearly, it should have been midnight.
He said if I blew him first he'd last longer....if 3 minutes is lasting longer, I'm not sure the bj was worth it
a hangover this bad deserves a feeding tube
ok understand this, i didn't pay for your dinner bc you said i wasn't going to get a blowjob for at least a month... this isn't a mail-in rebate deal, you gotta pay upfront
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
I'm not saying we can't have sex tonight, I'm just saying we have to work it around Lost.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
and then the other night his penis tricked us both into sex
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
the protein jug says add 2 scoops to your favorite beverage. guess who just found a way to make sam adams healthy? THIS GUY
I just don't want to have to pretend at every family function she brings him to that he didn't hit on me first
There's still flour in my hair. And I don't even want to know what the neighbors think happened infront of my house.
When he wears his hair down and sandals, he looks like Jesus. A Jesus I would fuck.
That's not what Jesus is for
When you mimic motorboating Jennifer Love Hewitt, is it really that hard to understand why no one thinks you're straight?
I just found vampire teeth and a moustache in my purse. do you know why?
Randomize