I just had to explain to the pharmacy cashier that the Plan B and thank you notes I was buying were not related.
I decided that just having that story under my belt and being able to tell it to my grandchildren is worth the regrets of the evening.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
I just bought 4 bottles of wine in sweats at 530 on a monday night. Fuck law school
Just hooked up with a girl I met in line at Taco Bell. I told you leave me to do my own thing and I'll get it in
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
Doing a circuit workout and using a power hour playlist for my 1 minute timers. I am getting old. creative, but old.
I can now recognize that when my wine bottle reaches a certain point, I probably shouldn't tweet, text or call anyone. RESPONSIBILITY
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
Randomize
