I just puked in the walgreens aisle buying gatorade and advil for my hangover... i guess i failed
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
you came in and threw goldfish on our blue carpet and screamed SWIM BITCHES and then made me drink a best friends potion with you
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
Wish i knew who the f is sending me pics of asian newborns.
then she kicked a hole in her own door and the next thing you know, brian's walking up to her room with power tools. in no condition to use them
Idk. I'm naked in front of the computer eating ribs. All is right with the world.
That's so nerdy and hot at the same time.
Can you send me a picture of you not naked, my mom wants to see what you look like
When did angry sex become our thing?
I need you there. I need someone to glance at when other people inevitably annoy me.
I just set an alarm for 5 am tomorrow morning titled "Wake and Bake Its Christmas motherfucker"
i gotta stop hooking up with people just to get to their dogs
Shut up. The only friend I need in life is Jim Beam because life is meaningless.
high I am. I am yoda. Yoda I am
I promise it wsnt a penis when i put it in my mouth
Randomize
