none of my boyfriends are responding right now, I thought I had enough to avoid this problem
I just realized I'm gonna get paid at midnight on New Years Eve. That could be dangerous.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
Just ran into that guy that tried to take a dump in your pool
...i'd have to set their sheets on fire.
I just did a line of coke with an Olympic bronze medallist. I guess we know why he only got bronze.
She had a tattoo on her pelvis that said "it's cock-o-clock" an had clocks and hot dogs exploding away from it. I'd like to tell you it was deal breaker buuuuuuut.......
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
Rule #36, branched off rule 4: Dave stays on a leash in crazy settings. It keeps him good and gets you laid.
So essentially he's like a puppy you can bring to a bar? Retractable leash or chain then?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
My phone just put together a highlight reel of yesterday's dick pic session, set to music and everything
We were supposed to have sex but we had smoked so much neither of us wanted to move.
He made me pay for half of dinner. Fucking feminist revolution.
Randomize
