I just wanted to let you know that if you dont tell me to stop texting i will still keep on trying, you matter to me
restraining order is on its way, crazy bitch
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
My vagina smells like strawberry tangerine twist.
He took the lighter and said "this is how I give myself a bikini wax."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Bad behavior is like a petri dish that grows organically In my heart
Dude next time u fuck on our counters will u please let me know BEFORE I make lunch.
Found out it was only pneumonia. We celebrated hydrocodone cough syrup. Two long island ice teas at lunch and the random white powder we found in her purse. Mother of the year award.
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
is it weird to think that girls born in '96 are now legal?
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
He ordered a meatball sub with a side of meatballs.
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
Anyone who does not consider cereal and wine as a balanced breakfast needs to leave immediately.
I never thought my gollum impression would lead to me getting laid.
Huzzah!
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