You just compared our sex life to a seven year old kid.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
no where in the syllabus does it say "no alcoholic beverages allowed".
Last night I ate parmesan cheese straight out of the container while watching Chelsea Lately. Look at what happens to me when you leave.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its that time of year where we just drink more instead of dressing warmer
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
okay the fridge is completely filled only with alcohol. Not even exaggerating. There is no food.
Sometimes I wonder if we're going to make it to 40.
The saddest thing about graduating is that we won't have free access to STI screening anymore
I was loaded. my pee still has a hint of lime
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Yeah I remember doing the worm in my moms room. While she's yelling at me and I'm making seagull nooises
Just caught myself checking an online porn site while in a strip club. Might have a problem.
Well I found my neighbors on tinder if you're wondering how my night went
This place is a maelstrom of dicks.
I mean as in stuck up bastards, not actual, desirable male genitalia. My point is, come pick me up fast, please!
I don't want to date him...I just want him to cheat on his girlfriend with me.
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