Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
Latenightwjoannablackberrywontletmespaceitknowsimdrunk
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
dunno bout you, but i grow tired of beef curtains
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Now for something completely different: ive figured out how to eat a banana without insinuating something completely naughty
i dodnt think we hooked up bcause he actually texted me the next day
I'm gonna hire strippers dressed like the founding fathers.
Interesting occurrence: the application I use to keep track of my periods and sexual encounters just notified me it had been over 4 months since you were logged as an active partner and ask if I'd like to remove you from my options. Wow, kmsl.
Dude, there are some things that you can't un-see. Her, beached on a dog bed, is one of them.
Also I just took Ritalin with coffee so if anyone wants to know what numbers sound like, I got you
Tell him you want to lick his face. Didn't work for me but might turn out better for you idk
Please tell your friend to stop shitting in my closet.
my goldfish that i got the day i lost my virginity just died. im terrified as to what this symbolically means for my sex life
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