Okay just took the preggers test..and im NOT! :)
awesome babe! drinks tonight!
Wait does the happy face mean yes? fuck.
Used tampon in my purse. That from you?
splinters make it hard to masturbate
hey, this is the drunk ass freshman from last night. thanks alot for helping me out last night, i'd probably be on some lawn if it wasn't for you guys! and my mom says thanks for talking to her
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
We left around 4am, just after you laid down on your front lawn to take a piss. After 15 mins I said "dude are you still peeing?" you replied "Nope, just laying here with my dick out."
I had to feed him the pizza because he was too blazed to do it himself
I think we've reached the point in the summer were we need to go back to school. I was so bored yesterday I nearly bought blow dart gun.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
the amount of 23-year-old guys who have seen me naked is starting to get a little worrying
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
I fucked her on her ex's Yankee sheets while she was wearing an Ortiz jersey...of course she gets to meet my mother
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
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