Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i cant finish this easy-mac because i need it for a chaser.
so when he was about to cum, he screamed his mother's name and continued to pray for forgiveness. wtf
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
He bought me Ben & Jerrys and then apologized for the fact that he was going to fall asleep before we could have sex
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
He goes "sorry was at the gym. Some of us workout " and I wanted to text him back and go "well some of us do occasional drugs so we don't have to"
Let me tell you the story of bicurious george
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
His name was Kyle but I insisted on calling him baby Jesus all night and then we did a line and he bought me Taco Bell so idk
Is it tacky to frame a negative pregnancy test?
He went down on me and then made me breakfast in bed. He's a man you can bring home to mom.
I just caught my bangs on fire trying to lite a bowl while driving. Thank god it wasn't my eyebrows like last time.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
Randomize
