Girl next to me just said "as a guy I used to sweat but not I don't. it's awesome" Oh. My. God.
3rd rule of buttsex she must be clean and shower recently
and skipped dinner
I woke up to the sound of a beer can being opened. I love him already
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
I'm the brains and you're the boobs of this operation.
If I don't get my shit together, I'm going to be one of those really fucked up cases on 1000 ways to die
drunk in woodshop so don't even say "I SAWWW THIS COMING." I know you're thinking it.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
When dressing for a 3way, how do I convey to the other chick I care enough to look pretty but not so much that it's a huge deal?
Me and you. The most fucked up people on the planet drinking together. Hell yeah
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
She said I can't embarrass her, the challenge has been set
Why is the microwave staring at me?!
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