Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
i'm using my hot pot to make jello shots in a muffin tin. i'm never ever graduating.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
You kept making up "snapple facts" every time you opened a beer.
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
It was awful. Mid hookup he started reading the titles of the books over my bed, which were about Russian imperial history. He then started asking me questions about the class I was reading the books for. I was like "WE HAVE TIME FOR THAT LATER, PLEASE CONTINUE."
Seriously my only wish tonight is to be at the club in a sombrero w my shirt off pouring tequila on bitches titties
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
I'm right down the road from AJ's old house and I'm getting mixed feelings. My vagina is remembering good dick. But the rest of me is remembering horrible times.
So we decided we're going to stop having sex...except for tonight. And probably tomorrow.
Remember when I made out with that stranger at the bar on my 21 in chicago? I wonder how he's doing
Do you think the hole in the ceiling will count against our security deposit?
These business classes have improved my drug business ten fold
Did you guys just have three hour sex? You both stopped and restarted texting me at the same time
If I were to say yes, would we still be friends?
Randomize