I just saw a commercial for "tickle me elmo hands" and I am almost 100 percent sure that at the end elmo said "yeaaaaa boooyyyyyy"
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
We all know tonight is going to end like every other night with you. drunk, pantless and confused. Dont try to switch things up.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
I sold weed for gas money to get home. I thought that's what college was for.
I want to get my vag crammed with complete loss of every bit of dignity I have left by this man from every angle on every flat surface that exists. That is all.
True enough. Do you ever think that these girls grandparents ghosts are watching you masterbate to their granddaughters and look at you in Shame?
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
I'm pretty sure his cum gave me swimmer's ear.
Smargarita sloshedurday tomorrow around 2
Bring a helmet for your liver
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
Idk if I want to put a bra on
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