its good for cellulite if you don't wear underwear. its true
I look better un-naked...
I just accidently tagged myself in the picture of the 16 year olds spreading their legs in bikinis. Failure.
Shark Week may as well be Shark Weed.
That blackeyed peas song was on, so I thought that was prediciting tonight was going to be a good night. And then my garage door opner fell and hit me in the head.
I literally just copy and pasted that from another bbm convo bc I'm far too stoned to explain that again.
She was wearing a "Got Beer" hat and your bed had necco wafers all over it the next morning. Another story for the grandkids.
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
Indeed. The kind of morning where puking in someone's shoes is not frowned upon
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Everyone was in jail by 10:30. I'd say it was a successful bachelor party.
Walked into a bathroom stall to pop an addy for my three back-to-back finals today. Felt like Clark Kent walking into a phonebooth.
I'm in his bed. I got up to puke. Im one eyeing it eating a hot dog bun. Wtf. This is my life
it’s not easy to sexualize brunch. work with me, babe.
I dont think the chain smoking, tequila shots or cocaine was good for my bronchitis.
Randomize
