Not that I thought your boyfriend was a phile
But the whole crossing guard thing? Weird.
isnt it creepy that our bodies make people
Just donated money to a kid for her softball team.
Obviously I'm trying to futher our next generation of lesbians. I may be hitting on her at the gay bar in ten years...
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
It's 4PM and I'm finally awake.. I'm covered in dog fur and shame. I'd say it counts as a good night.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
Woke up in my underwear and Christmas sweater. Only. Eggnog has won the battle but not the war.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
Very excited! Vodka will be shot, dicks will be ridden, and memories made.
Dunno yet. Probably just gonna play the s.t.d. russian roulette game with random bartenders at the beach again. Same 'ol same 'ol
She asked if she should pack the condoms, I told her I plan on drinking so much that it won't be possible.
"Masturbate" is an actual item on an actual ToDo list of mine. It is at the top.
Nothing says depression like laying in your bed stoned, naked, and eating a cupcake
come on Dane.. ive been there. im like the female version of you, except with morals
Randomize
