If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
My family just legit passed around a fifth of Maker's Mark. Also, this is sort of a Thanksgiving tradition. Also, Maker's Mark is really good.
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
When they say "all expenses paid" does that include bail?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My number one goal in life is to find out who can fill a keg with Popov
She sat on the toilet backwards so that she could hold onto the back part for balance. No she's not ready to go home.
You know where a good place to spend summer is? In your head. High as shit. It doesn't matter where you are.
dont iron anything. we fucked on the ironing board. details to follow.
Well then she has to know whoever you were kissing was in overalls because that's not a detail you just leave out.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Saw my drug dealer at Easter mass with his family so that was weird
I figured if he was OK cheating on his gf with a guy, he'd be OK with me posting his number to m4m Craigslist Ads
The first thing my Christmas gift money is buying is a dildo.
OH MY GOD I AM DYING. AS I WAS TEXTING I JUST BUMPED INTO A MOTHER FUCKING DEER. I AM SHAKING
Wait...Literally? You hit a deer...with your body?!
I PHYSICALLY RAN INTO IT. I FELT ITS WEIRD HAIR AND I EVEN APOLOGIZED CAUSE IT DINDT REGISTER THAT IT WASNT A PERSON. MORTIFIED.
So. Um. Hypothetically speaking...how would one get a squirrel out of the house?
My first hangover at work. I'm officially an adult.
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