okay pat passed out under dana's car
She told me she got a 15 on her A.C.T.. that's when I knew it was a done deal.
the way i see it, im about one adderall binge away from graduating
it's great music for shaving your balls
You are in charge of making sure that her vagina explodes with joy tonight.
You kept trying to hail an ambulance
IDK who she called, but some guy came into the party, flying drop kicked Joe said never again. She has to invite him around again.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
she asked how her costume looked and all i could say was bars are dark right?
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
I want a battle ostrich, get me a battle ostrich and then come and make love to me
It’s like a buffet of marriages! Every option is available to you!
Honey...this isn't my 20's. This is my 30's. I paid for this house and these expensive ass sheets to fuck in them. Get your ass over here.
you were so high you asked for half double stack and half crispy chicken sandwich "welded together" in the wendy's drive through
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Randomize
