The mall is playing a fucking country mix of lady marmalade.
welcome to maine.
I could make wine with my vomit
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I projectile vomited into my sink. Jealous?
Kind of. My puke would have just dribbled down my chin and missed the sink completely.
Ohh that happened after I started to cry.
He was wearing a Knicks jersey I had to go home with him. it was a rough season.
why weren't you at the audition last night?
booty call before role call
I'm using the size of your dick as a guage to see how big something is on Amazon. Any questions?
I know this is random but to this day I regret not having sex with you on that atv on the top of that mountain underneath the American flag.
I just did the math. It is, in fact, cheaper to go out drinking every weekend than it would be for me to pay for a legitimate therapist. What are you doing next Friday night?
So the dude who sold me my english book is the same guy who let me punch him in the face in exchange for a cig at a party a few weeks ago. small world huh ?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
I'm kinda surprised he wouldn't be honored to take me back as a fuck buddy.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
There are two guys here arguing over Pearl jam and Nirvana. 1991 wants its argument back.
Feel free to drag me back to reality at your convenience
Randomize
