He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
I just blindly shoved it in. I'm still not sure which hole I got.
I had a dream last night that I had sex with Abe Lincoln. I must stop watching the History Channel before I go to bed.
I think "I actually like giving blow jobs better" qualifies her as a keeper
Give me one reason I shouldn't put the phrase "sex emotions" into my essay.
No.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
let's see, i ended up walking for an hour towards a macdonalds that didnt exist, sprinted full tilt into a powerline, and left a 30 dollar tip to a waitress at dennys we made friends with. I REGRET NOTHING
Next time someone asks you what your spirit animal is do you really want to answer the iowa state fair butter cow?
Nothing like having your house arrest ankle bracelet vibrate and take a moisture sample at the exact moment you're about to blow it in some chick...buzzkill
Is that a question you really want to ask or do you just want to tell you that I can't walk without feeling like my legs are collapsing underneath me
We had sex and then stood naked in his living room eating zucchini bread.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Randomize
