my girlfriends now gay ex-boyfriend kissed me. tell maddie i can't hangout today
You know, Peter Parker would not have been nearly as cool if he had gotten bitten by an ant.
is she serious with that outfit? Why doesnt she just paste a for sale sign on her boobs?
She thought I was gay, so I told her I'd be more comfortable with anal. She agreed.
I don't plan to be alive for 2010 so ima say this 12 hours early. Happy New Year bitches
Just saw a girl leaving CVS on her bike with a case of beer. She tried to ride one handed with the case under her other arm and fell over off the sidewalk. I'm glad to see someone else's life is a bigger joke than mine.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
do you really not remember him getting up at like 4am with a leaf blower running through the house and telling people to "WAKE THE FUCK UPPP"
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Why do I have a wristband from the birthing center at the University of Maryland hospital....
The fact that you screamed, "Alf is my spirit animal!" is proof enough that we're too old for peyote.
I still judge her for aggressively trying to get coke from my date but pretty cool that she's a black belt
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
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