This is evicking siegelnvs
Im sorry?
This is fucking ridiculous*
I don't think brook has ever known best
Pls don't use the words alligator, purple, and sperm in the same sentence ever again.
I'm playing the Jersey Shore drinking game by myself at my mom's house. Things like this are not okay after college.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I don't even know where to begin....there's queso sauce and public hair stuck to everything
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
My boyfriend's brother just got out of jail and he is already telling us to steal cable. Dude.
Positive reinforcement! I'm training him for being a good boy and coming over. He gets sex and cookies.
I'm drunk enough to know I'm texting you and sober enough to know what I'm saying to you
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
Randomize
